Calls Me Home
by tessdamess
Summary: Instead of one year passing by before the second dark curse it was four. Now Emma must return to Storybrooke with a larger family than what she left with. How will everyone adjust?
1. Chapter 1

**CHAPTER 1**

 _'So many years_

 _Can leave behind_

 _Regretfully until it's time'_

It was six thirty a.m on a Monday morning which meant it was time to wake up and get breakfast and lunches ready for her small family. But not before sliding her hand over her husband's abdomen and placing a tender kiss on the back of his neck before groggily saying; "Time to get up, hun." The red headed man groaned slightly at the loss of contact as the blonde left the warmth of their bed.

"Sometimes I just wish furniture sold itself." he groaned as he got up and followed his wife to the closet to pick out their outfits of the day.

Emma picked out a classic black dress to go with her red leather jacket, she had a meeting with other bails bondmen and wanted to look her best. It was hard working in her field when it was so male dominated.

Emma had learned long ago, when Henry was in his terrible twos that you never changed until the kids were up and almost out the door, so she gently laid her clothes over the bed that her husband had just made, She smiled as he began changing into his usual business casual attire, "Remember to pick up Holly from daycare today, I have my meeting until 7 and won't be able to, and Henry has baseball practice until 5 as well so you know that means he'll be home at 8."

Soon after moving from Boston, following a terrible fire, Emma Swan and her 12 year old son Henry were exploring New York City when they met the handsome owner of a furniture store, Walsh Austin, following a wonderful lunch date the two began dating. Emma had been hesitant about the relationship, especially bringing him into Henry's life but he was great with him and Henry really seemed to like him as well so when a year passed by and Walsh proposed, passed the hesitation Emma gladly agreed. A year into their marriage Emma gave birth to their daughter Holly Swan Austin. Emma feared that the age gap between her children would mean that Henry wouldn't be interested in his sister or she would grow up without him being present but Henry fell in love with his sister that shared his mother's eyes and chin but Walsh's red locks. Henry was great with Holly, always going out of the way for his little sister. The little toddler had the family wrapped around her tiny chubby finger. That meant her father too, he changed the moment he held the small child it was as if he fell in love with everything all over again and Emma couldn't explain it but it did fill her heart with warmth.

Doing all the tedious things of a family always made Emma feel as if she finally achieved what she wanted; a family. Yet, even with the birth of Holly it made her think of her birth parents and how much she'd wish she'd get a chance to at least ask 'why?'.

"For sure! I'll also pick up some Chinese food on the way back for dinner, so let Henry know not to completely spoil his dinner after he hangs out with the team." Walsh barley finished saying as his phone on the nightstand rang. "This is Walsh." He answered as he smiled at his wife that proceeded to find her shoes for the day. "No I ordered the shipment 2 weeks ago it should be here today. I have requests I need to fulfill. Fine. Fine. I'll be there in 20. Just hold on." Walsh groaned as he hurried to his shoes. "Sorry babe, I got to go. I'll see you tonight, love you. Tell the kids to have a good day!" He said as he quickly gave her a peck on the cheek and almost ran out the door. Emma giggled at the silliness and simplicity that was her life. Her iPhone beeped with a text, not long after, she looked down to see it was from the recently exited man 'Sorry I ran out so quick. You're going to kill it today, good luck!' She smiled and mindlessly sent a reply as she headed to the kitchen to get breakfast ready for the kids.

Once breakfast was ready she knocked on Henry's door to wake him up since his alarm that had been blaring for the last 15 minutes never did the job. "Henry, time to get up or else there won't be time for breakfast." She heard the groan of the teenage boy and knew he'd be up soon, zombie like but he'd be up.

So Emma crossed the hall to the other room and saw her little girl still asleep so she gently sat next to her and began running her fingers threw her dirty blonde hair, Emma refused to admit it was red she wanted one of her kids to have her locks and not those of their respective father's. "Wakey wakey sleeping beauty, it's time for the day to start." Emma gently rose her daughter, who's favorite princess was Aurora and who's pajamas were of the same pink clad princess. Holly much like her brother and mother disliked mornings already and groaned but opened her eyes.

"MOM! Walsh! " Henry screamed enough to wake Holly had she not already been getting up. "Someone's at the door!" As much as Henry adored Walsh and had even helped Holly say 'dada' before 'mama' he claimed he was too old when Walsh joined their family for him to refer to him as dad without him feeling as it was forced.

"Your brother can be so lazy." Emma said to Holly as the toddler giggled. "I'll be back, find what you want to wear." Emma said before leaving, she was still too little to pick out her own clothes but it would definitely keep her entertained and the drawers were all low enough for her to make a mess. Emma walked out to the kitchen and saw Henry sitting on the stool already eating his eggs and pancakes. "You couldn't get the door?" Emma smiled while ruffling his hair on her way to the front door of their apartment.

Emma looked down at her watch and realized it was early barley past seven who could it be? She glanced into the peep hole and noticed a handsome man standing outside. Maybe a friend of Walsh's? She opened the door only to be greeted by a very peculiarly dressed man, long leather jacket, hook for a hand, and eyeliner adorning his blue eyes. Before she could speak he sighed "Swan" as if he found a promised land and the look of adoration that filled his face frightened Emma a bit, so reflexively took minimal step back. Yet, not fast enough as the man said "love" as he past the threshold of her apartment and she extended her arm alarmed.

"Do I know you?" She demanded, had she met this man and forgotten him or perhaps was he someone from her job and she instantly feared for her kids inside. Yet she couldn't bring herself to necessarily fear him.

"I need your help, something's happened, something terrible. Your family is in trouble." He said pleading and as much as Emma wanted to detect a lie she couldn't which only served to confuse her more.

"My family is right here." She said defiantly, she had no one else besides her kids and Walsh. "Who are you?"

"I know you can't remember me," his voice dropped as if that was a haunting thought but quickly returned to normal as he continued "but I can make you." And with that he reached over for the back of her head and brought her towards him for a quick kiss. A kiss that ended as soon as it began and Emma defensively kicked him in the groin and pushed him hard enough to send him towards the wall.

"What the hell are you doing?" She said trying her best not to be loud, she didn't want to frighten Henry or Holly.

As he groaned and began to stand up properly she moaned out "A long shot. I was hoping you felt the same as I did."

"All you're going to feel is the handcuffs when I call the cops on you." Emma said as she kept a hand in front of her ready to push him back again if need be.

"I know this seems crazy but you have to listen to me. You have to remember…" He tried as she finally closed the door in his face.

Killian Jones had thought of many different scenarios of how that reunion could work out, yet none of them were so badly executed as the one that just played out in front of him. He had sincerely believed that some part of Emma would remember him at the very least remember something about her family enough to not be put off. But he knew how closed off she was so he began mentally kicking himself for his poor handling of that. He wouldn't give up, not when after four long and painful years he finally laid eyes on her again. She was stunning, nothing seemed to change, she seemed content with her life and he couldn't help but wonder if it was a cruelty to take away her fake memories, her memories of raising Henry. Oh how he wished to see the lad too, he must be so big now, 16. He promised his father he would get them back and if Killian Jones was anything he was a man of his word.

* * *

Disclaimer: Once isn't mine, I'm just borrowing

A/N: Hope y'all liked it. Let me know if you're interested in seeing more. I have a couple chapters written so I promise I will update this soon.

-Tess


	2. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER 2**

 _'_ _It's funny how_

 _the walk of life_

 _can take you down_

 _without a fight'_

Royals from all across the Enchanted forest and other allies sat at the round table of Queen Snow and King David's Castle. The rulers and allies stared at the drawn map of the enchanted forest that included a darkened area to mark the territory that the Wicked Witch now controlled, which included Regina's castle.

Regina sat between Snow and Robin Hood. An alley that soon became something else in her life. Regina was much happier once she finally accepted Robin as her 'true love' and welcomed him and his young son Roland into her life. They built a castle not far from that of the Charmings' it was once George's territory thus David's but he had graciously agreed that she could built a castle there until they reclaimed hers. Yet that was four years ago. The war had been slowly brewing. At first the royals simply believed that the Witch desired to be left alone that was until after the birth of a new heir.

Snow and David grieved the loss of their daughter much like Regina did that of Henry's, they may have not been dead but they were gone from their lives and that was a pain a parent couldn't quite put into words. Yet soon after returning to the Enchanted Forest Snow discovered she was pregnant, they would be getting the chance to be parents again. Their guilt over losing Emma intensified but they were able to compartmentalize it and focus on welcoming their baby. That was until the Witch declared she wanted the heart of the child. Snow and David feared the worst, they weren't willing to lose another child, not again.

"I say we invade through the East. It gives us the best chance to corner her towards the coast and occupy her men long enough for Regina and the fairies to intervene." Prince Philip stood pointing towards the map. Him and Aurora may have a smaller castle but they had been left behind by the original curse which made them experts on the land for the last thirty years. There loyalty was strong, it had been tested when they were turned into flying monkeys but luckily Regina and the fairies discovered a way to reverse that, with no adverse affects to the child they were expecting.

"It'll be useless unless we get stronger magical wielders" Abigail spoke up directly glancing at Baelifire, who preferred his modern world name of Neal, who sat representing the castle and land of the Dark One. "How about you get something from 'daddy' to help?"

"We have gone over this! My father's magic can't be involved." Neal said bringing his fists down to the table. They had gone over it time and time again. With Rumpelstiltskin gone Neal inherited everything that once belonged to him, Belle had shared the castle with him as he felt it was more hers than it was his but she moved back to her father's castle to care for him when he became ill, which left him at the helm of it all and her of her father's land and resources. "You have everything the Dark Palace can offer, I'm sorry that is all I can do."

"Don't worry Neal. We understand and have already agreed not involving Rumpelstiltskin's potions is a better idea anyways." Snow said comforting the man that was so often belittled in their meetings for being the son of the Dark One yet graciously continued to show up to help the family of his son, who he may never see again.

"So what? We risk our men, our land, our lives and those of our kids only to lose when the Witch takes out the _Mayor_ here?" Abigail said aggravated, she still resented Regina because the war they were waging was against no one other than her sister.

"Look, this is a joined war. We stand together and fight or we stand alone and watch everything we build, long before the curse and after our return, crumple to the ground. Or worse we lose what we love most in the world; our children. Trust me losing a child is the worst feeling in the world, Snow, Regina, Neal and I have endured that. There isn't a day that goes by that we don't think of the child we won't see but we have the comfort of knowing they are alive and well, so I refuse to let our kingdoms' children parish because we couldn't act together. The pettiness ends, the differences are put aside because we are not losing our son and we will not let her destroy this world and destroy anything else." James stood up and cast a glance at Abigail who he knew would always stand on his side but was just hard headed especially when she feared the father of her child to be, Frederick, might die fighting this war. A fear they all had about each other. She simply nodded at David and smiled as she reached for her husband's hand.

—

Emma had opted for omitting telling her husband about the strange man knocking on her door and kissing her. Why? She wasn't too sure but she just had an inkling that it was better left unsaid. The rest of her day was uneventful as was her following morning, her and Walsh were celebrating that he landed a major deal and he decided to treat his wife to a date night in the same restaurant he proposed to her at, 3 years prior.

She caught the guy she was after so she was in a great mood and was so ecstatic for her husband and his small business, that just kept growing. They were having a lovely dinner when his phone rang and he apologized and stepped outside to answer the call as the restaurant was a tad noisy. Emma gratefully took the opportunity to look down at her phone and shoot Henry a text, 'How's babysitting duty? You both okay?'

She felt someone approaching but failed to look up as she read Henry's message 'You worry too much.' attached was a picture of Holly napping besides her big brother using a slice of pizza as a pillow. Emma giggled and said to whom she assumed was her husband "Wait a second look at what Henry sent." Yet as she looked up she withdrew her phone quickly, because in front of her was the mystery man from before. "You!?"

"I can explain." he quickly jumped in knowing how agitated she could get.

"You are a stalker!" She said harsher.

"Don't scream, just hear me out. I don't do this very often so treasure it, love. I've come to apologize."

Emma was taken back by the man that seemed so sincere yet so full of mystery so she discreetly placed her phone faced down hoping to take her kids away from him, even virtually, and grabbed the steak knife in front of her. "For trying to kiss me?"

"I was simply trying to jog your memory."

At that Emma knew, no matter why a part of her was aching to trust him, she couldn't he was spitting out complete nonsense. "It's time for you to go, now."

"Your parents are in great danger." Killian tried hoping the mention of the royals he grew fond of would push Emma to believe him.

"You really have no idea what you're talking about." Emma said a part of her relieved that man in font of her really didn't know her.

"Because you think you're an orphan?" He said the word carefully knowing how painful that identity had been to his Swan. "Because that's haunted you your whole life? Well I'm here to tell you everything you've believed is wrong."

His conviction may still startle her but she calmly looked at him a said, "You don't know me."

"Alas, I know you better than you know your self. I have proof. He pulled out the piece of paper and unfolded it, and handed it to her, causing her to let go of her knife. "Here's an address, take a gander. If you want to know who you really are. Who your parents are. Go there."

Emma hardly spoke of her birth parents a subject she preferred to not broach even with Walsh so it was only causing her to get even more upset, she turned really hoping her husband was off the phone and retuning to their table soon. "Leave - now." She commanded hoping to end the conversation.

"You've been there before, four years ago. You just don't remember."

"Four years ago, I was in Boston until a fire destroyed my apartment and I moved to New York to have a fresh start with my son. "

"Regina really did a number on you." He grinned and it made her heart skip a beat.

"Emma leaned back onto her chair crossing her arms, she couldn't deny he was handsome but she couldn't explain something about him felt different "You're a crazy person or a liar or both."

"I prefer 'Dashing Rapscallion'" He said with a glint in his eyes that only made her heart flutter more which made her glare at him. "Scoundrel?"

"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't punch you in the face? Or better yet tell my husband and have him do it." She said as a part of her felt terrible for her feelings and having not told Walsh what happened the morning prior.

"Husband?" Killian stopped with the smirk and shine in his eyes it was as if someone dumped ice water on him. He assumed the man that was eating with Emma was someone courting her but never did he assume she married the man.

"Yes, and he's right outside so leave, now." She said as she tried to decipher the look of despair on his face.

"Do you really not believe me?" Killian asked heart broken, maybe his Swan really never was his. Maybe as much as he had fallen for her she hadn't fallen for him. He couldn't focus on that now, once she remembered everything she could realize the mistake her marriage was and while he hoped it didn't cause her heart ache a part of him wished she'd regret it. "Try using your superpower, see if I'm lying. Yes, I know about that. Tell me I'm lying and I'll leave right now."

Emma hesitated he wasn't lying and that's what had scared her from the beginning. She could lie but she didn't want to and she didn't know why. "Just because you believe something doesn't make it true."

He was relieved that she hadn't lied to him, it gave him hope; "Maybe, maybe not, but I know you Swan and you can sense something's off. Go to that address, take a chance. Then you'll want to talk and when you do I'll be in central park by the entrance for the zoo. Don't do it for me, do it for you. Do it for your family, they need your help." With that he left a stunned Emma behind as he took off.

"Sorry, that took a while." Walsh said claiming his seat again only to notice the distraught face on his wife. "Are you alright?"

Emma straightened out herself she could tell her husband, whom she loved, that a crazy guy who made her heart skip a beat started speaking about her parents a past and a bundle of other nonsense or she could not. And a part of her was screaming at herself for opting for the latter, "Sorry, I got distracted. I think I'm just tired. But so is our daughter look at this." She said brining up her phone again to the image that Henry had sent a while back.

Walsh held the phone and Emma couldn't help but see his face flash a range of emotions, love and adoration but what caught her eye was his look of fear and sternness. "Hey, are _you_ alright?"

"Yeah, sorry, that is an amazing picture, what do you say we go home to our wonderful pizza filled children?" He said extending his arm as he called over a waiter for their check.

—-

The next morning as she was sitting Holly on her high chair as Henry and Walsh were grabbing their respective things to begin their days as she remembered Henry had a college tour field trip coming up. "Henry before you go, bud, remember to turn this into Mr. Edwards for your field trip to NYU next week." She walked over to her jacket and pulled out the pieces of paper only to realize one of those was the one from the guy from the night before so she quickly stuffed it in her pocket. She glanced back hoping Walsh hadn't seen but he seemed to be looking at her with an almost pleading look, as if he knew what she hadn't been telling him. She quickly gave the slip to Henry who was eager to get out as he and his friends walked to school together. He gave her a quick kiss and then walked over to Holly to give her kiss and then fist bump Walsh before taking off.

"You okay?" She said to Walsh that was looking at her carefully.

"Huh?" Walsh said caught off guard. "Yeah for sure, why?"

"I don't know, you just seem off." She questioned, maybe she was over analyzing him but being married to someone meant you knew them pretty well and he was distracted even when he played with Holly it was almost as if he needed to take mental pictures of things before it all ended, which only served to worry her, she reminded herself that he was not Neal and she wasn't a 17 year old girl anymore but it still ignited a fear deep within her.

"Hey come here." Walsh said pulling her towards a hug. "I love you. I love our kids and there is absolutely nothing off."

Emma smiled and for the first time in her relationship with Walsh she caught him lying to her.

* * *

Disclaimer: Once is still not mine, neither is the song by Shannon LaBrie.

A/N: Thank you so much to everyone that is so interested in this story. I received a lot of questions of the shipping of this story and while this chapter may answer that a bit more, this will be a CaptainSwan fic I'm sorry if that bothers anyone, however, the overall theme is the Charming family. Let me know what y'all thought.

-Tess


	3. Chapter 3

**CHAPTER 3**

 _'_ _To realize the moment_

 _when you turn around'_

Snow, Charming, Regina, Robin Hood, Red, Granny, Neal, the Dwarves and the fairies were all bundled around the round table, ignoring the vacant seats of the royals that weren't present. This was following an attack when the families were heading towards the home of Philip and Aurora their carriages had been attacked despite the cloaking spells the fairies and Regina had co-created. The attack left most of their men injured and in bad shape as well as Robin Hood with a nasty wound that required Regina's magic to heal. Yet it wasn't the casualties or injuries that frightened them it was the fact that the target was so evidently the young Prince Leopold, the three year old luckily was saved by a knight after he had been snatched. It however left a sour taste in Snow and Charmings' mouths. They weren't willing to lose their child and the stakes had been escalated.

Luckily with the help of Belle, Regina was able to decipher why the sudden desire for the young prince when he had been growing in the palace with his parents for the past three years. It soon became evident to them that the Wicked Witch wanted Leo because so long as he was younger than four his heart was appraised higher and would be worthy of a bundle of other dark spells as opposed to when the marker hit and he turned four. Originally the Charmings and their alleys believed that by hiding Leo and protecting him until he turned four they could hold off on the queen but she had destroyed land and slaughtered villages leaving some Royals with nothing to their names and worst countless families destroyed. It forced the hand of the council to unite and fight, but as the year progressed the attacks grew more violent and while all forces impeded the Witch's men from even nearing the Charmings it had so obviously failed when one of them was able to hold the young prince ready to deliver him and his heart.

After running back to their castle the Charmings called their most trusted allies forgetting about the royal decrees, they had to figure out a way to stop her, politics be damned.

"Neal, when we first arrived you said you wanted to find out if your father was alive or could be brought back, did you?" Snow quietly spoke up. She held a sleeping toddler in her hands, refusing to let go of him following the recent events.

Neal was taken aback by the question he wanted to resurrect his father for the past four years but the Charmings were deadly opposed and with the war and his efforts also focused on trying to find a way to see if Henry and Emma were alright, something he failed to mention to anyone else besides Belle, there hadn't been time following the first lead he discovered. "I… I may have figured out a way three years ago but… but it was a trap set up by the Witch." Neal took a deep breathe it was time he came clean, "It was a life for a life deal but when I went it didn't know that, had Belle not stopped me I'd be dead. However the mirage allowed me to speak to my Papa, he said the way to defeat her was the same as any other darkness… the light, to find the strongest light. I assumed he meant Emma so I've been working on a way to try and see her, maybe communicate with her. Belle and I even created memory potions for her and Henry."

The revelation stunned the room, the mention of Emma and Henry so often bought up the emptiness they felt so they opted for mentioning them as minimally as possible when it wasn't something positive. Roland and Leo grew up with the mentions of their siblings and they knew of their great sacrifice but the parents sitting around the table had stopped bringing up the possibility of finding them because it only left them worse off.

"You couldn't have told us this three years ago?" Regina roared, if there was even a remote chance she could see Henry, even Ms. Swan for that matter, she would do anything for it.

"I didn't think it mattered…" Neal began before Charming who was also fuming interrupted. "You what? Of course it does Neal. If we can get back to them…." but soon Neal took a page from Charming's play book and cut him off. " That's the thing. There isn't any way!" Neal stopped as he saw the Charmings' and Regina's faces fall, so he lowered his voice, also for the sake of the child Snow cradled. "It only served to reinforce the idea that we have no way back to them. I haven't been able to accomplish anything, not even an image of them."

The room was left in a shattering silence. No one wanted to be the one to move on, in case the parents of the lost children weren't ready so they remained silent. Robin Hood reached over for Regina's hand only to have her pull away. He knew how hard the mention of Henry was for her and he assumed the mention of Emma was just as difficult for the Charmings as they simply stared at their youngest child.

"What about other light magic?" The Blue Fairy spoke finally dissolving the silence.

"Sorry but I doubt you and the other oversized moths cut it." Regina snarked

The Blue Fairy ignored the former Evil Queen and continued, "Not us, but perhaps we fight magic from Oz with some more magic from Oz, the Good Witch - the Witch of the South, if we locate her perhaps she will stand a chance against Zelena."

The group quietly agreed, it was a journey that they were ready to embark if it meant protecting their family.

—-

Walsh took Holly to daycare on his way to the furniture shop, which left Emma home alone to collect her thoughts. She was supposed to go on a stake out but the good thing about her job meant she had a lot of flexibility. She stared at the paper in front of her. The address wasn't far from her she could take a subway there and clear up the nonsense that was going through her head. She was so confused, between the mystery man and her husband acting strange she knew something was off but she couldn't necessarily bring herself to stop thinking of what the implications of those two things were.

If her parents were out there and were looking for her, she could finally have the opportunity she'd waited for, for thirty-four years, but at the same time the man was mad if he believed anything about her somehow knowing him. A part of her believed him though, it was as if she was drawn to him in a way she couldn't understand. And that worried her, she loved Walsh, he was great with her and the kids, he was everything she ever wanted, a family. Yes, at first she thought of running, of just making sure she'd miss it, him, but with Henry and especially Holly involved she couldn't leave him. Not that she wanted to, she reminded herself, she was happy and not mentioning the mystery man didn't negate that it just confused her in a way she couldn't put into words.

But her husband also confused her; he seemed to be keeping his own secrets which frightened Emma. As much as she had tried to be more open with him and her family it was hard to forget 30 years of being alone, of being a single mother. Then there was the whole lie thing, which could easily be him stressed out about the business deal he had just closed but something told her it was more than that. She didn't want to bring it up and make a big deal over something that could so easily be nothing, especially when she was actually hiding something.

Emma groaned as she grabbed her red coat and put it on. She would regret if she didn't go, even if it was a meaningless result. She knew once she finally got past the mystery man, when she found out he was crazy, she could tell Walsh and then finally stop feeling like she was betraying him. So with that she grabbed her keys and headed out the door.

—-

Snow, Charming and Regina walked amidst the Dark Forest in search for a lead to the Witch of the South. Luckily for them Belle was handy with stories and tales and found a remanent prediction of the Witch being cast to the Dark Forest which lead the three to agree to go. Robin Hood had been hard to leave behind as he so devotedly wanted to help the love of his life and the Charmings, it was only after he was put in charge of the care of Roland and Leo did he realize the importance of also staying behind.

"Stop looking so worried. She'll help us and once this is finally over we'll finally be able to raise Leo normally." Charming reassured Snow as he held her hand. He knew how hard it was for her to be away from Leo, it was killing him, but they had to make the journey.

Snow's hesitation and long face did partially stem from her missing her youngest child but it also did from the pain the meeting from the night before brought up. For just a second she believed she would see her daughter again and then it all crumbled, again. Snow liked to imagine that Emma moved to a quieter city, not as rambunctious as New York City, and she got Henry and herself a dog and maybe she even started dating a nice normal man and they were happy. She played the fantasy over and over in her head, if it was true her daughter would be happy and she would suffer a thousand times if it meant that, her baby was happy and safe, far, far away from this madness.

"What else is wrong?" Charming whispered to Snow as he began slowing their pace allowing for more distance between them and Regina to form. "Is…is this about what Neal said?" Charming said taking a breath before asking. He hated bringing it up because it only made him feel anger at their loss followed by an emptiness nothing would ever fill and he knew it did the same to both women he was on the journey with.

Snow looked up at the man she so deeply loved, the man that understood her pain as no one else did. She tried to give him a meager smile but failed as the tears she didn't know she had been holding cascaded down her pale skin. Snow soon felt the strong arms of her husband embrace her as he cradled her head much like he did with Leo and how she remembered him doing with Emma, it was his way of comforting her. "I promise, we will not lose our child." he hummed as he gently swayed her. He swore to never allow them to experience that pain again.

Charming's words failed to comfort Snow as she sobbed, "We already lost, her."

—

Emma reached the apartment listed on the paper and gently checked the door knob when a voice startled her. "Hey, that your place now?" A chubby aging man asked.

"No, just checking on a friend." Emma said trying to be short as possible as she hid the things she was planning on picking the lock with in her pocket.

"Out'a luck then, girly. Your boy hasn't been seen in about four years. He bought the place so it's still there but no one ever comes. Here I thought he sold it to you." the man explained.

"Well no, thanks for the info though." Emma said as she let go of the handle and prepared to head downstairs until the old man left but luckily he didn't seem interested any longer and simply reentered one of the neighboring apartments. She quickly pulled out her pins and unlocked the door slowly, making sure no one saw her enter and no one was inside.

'He' was all that raced in her mind, was it her birth father's place? Was it the mystery man's place was he setting her up for something? She calmed her nerves and walked around and the first thing that caught her attention was a dreamcatcher by the window, how she loathed those things. She picked it up and as she analyzed the knick knack she realized what 'he' it was, Neal.

She was standing in Neal's place, as she looked around and saw the CD's on the stand, her suspicions were growing stronger and when she picked up extremely dusty envelopes she read the name that confirmed it all, 'NEAL CASSIDY'. The man had mentioned that he left four years ago, maybe he bounced when he realized she was in town, it was what he was good at after all. As she was preparing to leave she noticed a camera just like the one Henry had in Boston, but unfortunately lost during the fire, maybe she could take it, it was the least she could do after everything, besides they didn't make them anymore and Henry would be so happy. As she walked over to the camera, her heart stopped it had a camera strap with the name 'HENRY' printed on it. "That's not possible." She murmured, he didn't know, he couldn't know, but he did. Emma felt her stomach clench as she realized that the mystery man was connected to Neal, what if Neal all of sudden wanted to get into Henry's life. She didn't know if he was ready, she didn't know if she was ready. She gripped the strap so tight her knuckles began turning white, she tried to even her breathing as she thought of the implications, if Neal was interested in Henry she'd fight like hell before he'd hurt her son. But what if Henry wanted to meet him, her mind asked. She always told Henry that Neal left her and not him and that if he were ever to want to find him, she'd help him but as Henry grew up, especially with Walsh in his life, he never asked, though she always suspected it was because he wanted to spare her feelings.

For now all she could do was demand answers from the mystery man, it was one thing for him to bombard her life, but she wasn't letting him anywhere near her kids. With that Emma stuffed the camera into her pocket and walked out of the apartment.

* * *

 **A/N:** I'm sorry if some of you aren't enjoying the story but PMing and letting me know I'm terrible isn't going to change much. I know the Emma may be a little OOC but please keep in mind this Emma that had a very different life, she never gave Henry up and never found Snowing that is all going to change soon no worries. Also thank you to everyone who is reviewing and reading.

 **Disclaimer:** Still not mine


	4. Chapter 4

**CHAPTER 4**

 _"With nothing_  
 _But a voice within_  
 _That calls me_ …"

As Killian saw her approaching he couldn't help but feel his heart swell, she had come, as much as he believed in his idea a part of him feared that his Swan, well this version of her - this married version of her, would talk herself out of believing him. "Swan…" he sighed when she finally reached him, always so serious but also always so breath taking. "I knew that'd work. It's good to see you again."

Emma tried to avoid the flutter his voice and devoted look sent to her stomach, as she reminded herself of why he could be so dangerous to her and her child, "Why didn't you tell me that was Neal's place?"

Killian finally fully noted that she wasn't just serious she seemed to be anxious, perhaps worried, and he realized that memory-less Emma had a lot yet to resolve with Baelfire. This Emma had yet to reach the understanding his Swan had with the young lad he had once cared for. "I think the tone of your voice answers that quite clearly. You wold never have gone if I had."

"What does Neal have you up to? Is he trying to get into Henry's life? How does he even know about him?" She questioned, she never even so much as listed Neal Cassidy on Henry's birth certificate opting to leave it blank. Of course a simple age count would make it easy for Neal to decipher Henry's parentage but that'd imply him looking her up. So much was racing through her mind.

"I already told you. I'm not here because of Neal. I'm here because your parents are in trouble, their entire kingdom has been cursed, ripped back to Storybrooke." he said, tried explaining again, he wanted the conversation redirected to the royals that needed his help now more than ever.

"What are you talking about? My parents? Their kingdom? A curse? Do you know what you sound like?" Emma couldn't help but pity the man, maybe he was just crazy but still the conviction to his words were so strong it still made her feel 'off'.

"Like a madman, I'm sure." Killian softly responded as he noted the look of disbelief in her eyes, maybe he'd been wrong and he wouldn't be able to easily convince her. But at whatever the costs he would try, he was more than a pirate he discovered when she wasn't around, he was a man who lost something, or someone, he couldn't replace. "But it's true. Your parents need you. You're the only one who can save them. If you don't believe me at all, why did you come here?"

"Because Neal has a camera with my son's name on it. How?" For a moment it felt so real but his final question reignited Emma's curiosity in what mattered how Neal knew about her son.

"Don't you see? That is proof of what I'm saying Henry must have left that in the apartment when you were in New York four years ago." Killian realized Emma was cursed but a part of him knew she had to believe something.

"Not good enough, I want answers - real ones."

Killian sighed this was harder than he expected but he knew regardless of her not fully believing him a part of her was intrigued, "There's only one way you'll get those. Drink this."

Emma stared in disbelief at the weird small blue bottle with a cork on it, "Drink the thing the crazy guy just offered me? No, thank you."

"It will help you remember everything you've lost. For the last four years you've lost something, love, and this will return that to you. If even a part of you believes, take a leap of faith, give it a go." Killian said extending the bottle towards her, he knew how difficult it must be for her to accept her life is fake especially if she had a husband and believed she raised Henry.

Emma stared at his eyes and couldn't help but think those were the bluest eyes she'd ever seen, He was so sincere it was as if he was reading her, as if he understood her and that's exactly what motivated her actions. She slowly pulled out the handcuffs from her coat and wrapped it around his good hand that still grasped the bottle and tightened it as she said "Call me 'love' one more time and you'll lose the other hand."

"Swan, what are you doing?" Killian hissed as she walked him backwards and tied him to a bench.

"Making sure you never bother me or my family again." Emma said as she whistled for the officers she had called earlier. She avoided looking at his eyes as she briefly saw the heartbreak. "This is the guy, the one who assaulted me." She informed the officers

"It was a kiss." Killian could barely say as he felt his heart ache at the reminiscent event, she had once before left him tied up because she couldn't bring herself to trust him.

"There you go, he confessed." With that she turned her back as he continued to call out to her, only causing every step she take to feel like it carried the weight of the world with it. She reminded herself that she needed to protect Henry.

—

The meeting with Galinda proved useless she informed the Charmings there was no way for her to help them and that she was rendered powerless when she was cast out of Oz. She did however encourage them to seek out Emma, only leading the duo back to square one.

Once they returned to Regina who was unable to pass through the portal, apparently regardless of her change the darkness in her past lingered in her heart, they informed the queen of what the witch said. "So we walked all they way here for nothing?" Regina demanded as she noted the withdrawn look Snow had.

"Not for nothing, perhaps it's time we take drastic action." Charming said kneeling down near Snow. "I think we should enact the dark curse."

Snow looked at her husband in bewilderment, none of them were able to pay the price how could he bring it up? But before she could ask Regina interrupted, "I can't enact it. As much as I love Robin and Roland the… what I love the most is Henry. And well he's not exactly here."

"You can't but one of us can. You can." Charming said turning to Snow as he grabbed her hand, "We love our children and would do anything for them but we still share true love… we're each other's true love. You… you can crush my heart to enact the curse and get back to our girl." He said as he tried his hardest to stop the tears that were threatening to form, he had to be strong.

"No, no, absolutely not!" Snow said gripping tighter, she wasn't going to let him go. "Leo needs you. I need you. Emma will need you. We'll find another way, we always do. No, not this."

"Snow," Charming let go of Snow's hand only to place both hands on her face and gently wipe the few tears that had already fallen. "You know this is the only way. If there had been anything else any of us would've done it long ago. We have to do this Snow. For Leo, for the kingdom we have to stop her." He paused as more tears streamed down Snow's face, she knew he spoke the truth, even Regina stepped away to give them room. "You find our girl and you tell her how much we've missed her and you help her defeat this witch and after you raise our beautiful son and watch him grow up to be a valiant prince. Please let me do this to save our child."

With his last word Snow pulled back and hugged her husband, she knew he spoke the truth, they couldn't allow their son to die but it didn't make it any harder for her as she gripped onto him. They would have to act fast, the other royals wouldn't all agree with the choice, most despising their time in Storybrooke as they lacked control over their subjects and land.

—

Emma picked up Holly from the daycare earlier than usual, shooting a text over to Walsh saying she hadn't needed to complete her stake out and would be taking their daughter. She walked with the toddler at her side barely keeping pace but refusing to be picked up or sat in her stroller which lead to Emma pushing the stroller with one hand and holding onto her daughter with the other.

They turned into the local drugstore, Emma being careful of Holly loving to grab things and not mentioning anything leading to awkward encounters when either of her parents walked out of stores and the alarms blared. "Pwincess" Holly giggled as she tried reaching for a cheap Sleeping Beauty plate that Emma was sure she had several of at home.

"Not right now, kiddo." She said picking her up and sitting her in her stroller as she fussed, it would be easier to navigate the store. Emma hushed the little girl's whimpers that died down as she found another thing to occupy her attention. She finally reached the photo department and quietly asked for her order.

Maybe she was just curious of the life Neal lived now, she assured herself that was normal. Maybe he'd gotten married himself, she recalled the apartment and highly doubted it but that also fueled her desire to look into his life a little. With that she paid and quickly checked to see if her little shoplifter hadn't swiped anything before walking out of the store. Once she exited she opened the package.

As soon as she saw the first picture, she gripped the stroller tighter. She stared at it, she was sitting with Henry somewhere called Storybrooke, that was what the mystery man, who she now knew was named Killian Jones, had said. As she started looking through the pictures she noticed it was a trip to New York she didn't remember. She tried her hardest to decipher if they were photoshopped but she couldn't. They seemed as real as anything she'd seen before. A part of her couldn't understand, who was the blonde man that sat next to her and the dark hair pixie cut woman that sat next to Henry and why did looking at them all of a sudden make her heart feel tight? She was sure she didn't know them, yet in the picture they looked happy together, almost as a family.

Emma was brought back to her reality as Holly began crying having dropped her stuffed bear. It was crazy, this was her family, her daughter, her son and her husband. Holly stopped crying as she held the bear again smiling at her mommy, and Emma forced one back. She knew she had to go to the police department and speak to Killian.

"Hey kid, how was school today?" Emma asked Henry as soon as he picked up her call, she always tried to call him as soon as he got out of class if she wasn't intended to be home it helped them all she knew.

"Good, you wouldn't believe it! Today in science they Mr. Hanning brought his pet snake, he named it Robert can you believe it?" Henry quickly began rambling, "I think we need to bring up the pet discussion again."

"A snake? No way kid. That's just weird." Emma laughed as she put he pictures away and began pushing Holly towards their apartment.

"They're not! Did you know the shed their skin up to, like, four times a year. But if they're babies they shed their skin almost every two weeks." Henry laughed as he knew his mom's dislike for the amphibians but he had always been interested. "You know what'd be weird?"

"More than this conversation, what?"

"If human's did that, then Holly would shed her skin and…."

"Okay. Okay. I'm going to stop you right there. I don't need to picture your sister as a snake combo. Also speaking of your sister, you don't have plans right now right?" Emma tried to remember his schedule but as he grew up she had begun giving him more freedom and trusted him and his friends, after running a quick check on them, so she let Henry mostly plan his day he just had to let her or Walsh know and be home at 9.

"Nope. I was just planning on passing level 24 of my video game, I'm a Knight now." Henry said proudly. She loved how into those things he got, her and Walsh tried playing with him but she was barely a level 4 and Walsh was stuck on level 2 which only left Henry laughing at them.

"Would you mind watching Holly for an hour or two? Sorry to ask, kid, but I picked her…" Emma began, she always disliked asking Henry to babysit, he recently started asking to when he found out how much they paid babysitters and wanted a little extra spending money, but she was still hesitant. Emma just feared she would turn into one of her foster parents that dumped the little kids on the older kids, Henry deserved better.

"Mom, stop, I really don't mind. She can help me play." Henry quickly offered he knew why his mom worried but she really didn't have to, he loved spending time with his sister. Besides she was a calm kid, besides a couple princess and knight games he could just hand her an unconnected controller and play video games with her giggling as she thought she was playing too.

"Thanks kid. Can you get her downstairs I'm almost home." Emma smiled.

"For sure, I'll head down now." Henry said before hanging up. As she reached her walk home she couldn't help but push the image of Henry laughing and looking so happy in that picture out of her mind. She knew he was happy with their life, but something seemed different in that image which is why she needed to see Killian Jones again.

* * *

 **A/N:** Thank you so much for all the reviews and encouragement I will be continuing this story, I promise. [Also please note my username did change.]

 **Disclaimer** :Still not mine

-Tess


	5. Chapter 5

**CHAPTER 5**

As Killian walked out into the brisk New York air he smiled as he was finally able to put his hook back on, but also cause the pudgy officer had mentioned that the "pretty blonde" had dropped the chargers, meaning that his Swan for some reason must've believed him or at the very least didn't want him to suffer in this world's cruel metal brig. Before he could continue to contemplate which of the two it was he heard her call out, "Hey" making him snap his head in her direction. "We need to talk" she explained he smiled as he descended the stairs to her.

"Ah, Swan." He grinned, she was going to speak to him that was all he hoped from her. "I knew you wouldn't let me rot in that cage. I've been in my fair share of brigs, but none as barbaric as that. They force fed me something called bologna."

"What the hell are these?" Emma asked thrusting forward a picture of her and Henry smiling in front of a large sign that read 'Storybrooke'. "We never lived in a town called Stroybrooke" Emma had played the name over and over in her head, she moved Henry around a lot as a child at first hoping to find Neal and after just hoping to find a home, once he was old enough he asked her to stop moving so much and they decided to stay in Boston until the fire but not once in that time did they live in Storybrooke. "We never took a flight from Boston to New York, we never did any of this!"

"So you believe me then." Killian tried his best to phrase it as a statement but his voice and mind wavered this was after all his Swan, with a different kind of wall protecting her.

"I don't know! You could've photoshopped these pictures." Emma exclaimed almost pleading for his eyes to betray him and let her know this was all some ridiculous practical joke.

"Photoshop?" He would never get over the ridiculous names of some of the inventions of the current land.

"Faked."

"If you think these are forgeries, why did you spring me from the brig?" Killian saw the moment her pleading eyes knew he hadn't forged the images, she knew. "Because as much as you deny it, deep down, you know something's wrong. Deep down you know I'm right." And Killian knew it wasn't about him, it was her trying her best to not believe, from what he had heard around Storybrooke he knew it took Emma watching her son die for her to believe. He would never it let it get that far but it still unnerved him.

"It's not possible. How could I forget all of this?" Emma said still mentally listing all the cities her and Henry had lived; Chicago, Portland, Tallahassee, San Diego, Dallas, Boston and finally New York. Never a Storybrooke, she still wasn't even sure what state it was supposed to be in.

"I promise you there's an explanation," Killian explained, he could still read his Swan like an open book, she was struggling with not wanting to believe.

"Not one that makes sense."

"If you drink this, it will." He sighed, as he pulled out the blue bottle and extended it towards her, she wasn't going to believe otherwise and he knew, he just needed an ounce of her trust.

Emma stared at the man in front of her as a part of her was dying to run the other way, grab her kids and run but another part her knew that there had to be more to the story and wanted to reach for the bottle. "If- _if_ what you're saying is true…I'd have to give up my life here."

"It's all based on lies."

His words pierced her heart in an explicable way if her life were lies, which parts were lies, she couldn't fathom a life in which she didn't have her kids or Walsh, but was that because of whatever Killian said. _No._ A part of her brain repeated as a mantra, 'based on lies' her daughter and her husband were lies. What if a part of her despised them? What if, he was right, and when she knew she would lose them or Henry? "It's real… and it's pretty good. I have a family, a job, a guy I love." Her life was real. Her love was real. Right? Emma couldn't stop questioning it.

"Perhaps there's a man you love in the life that you've lost." Emma looked up, he was speaking of himself, she knew. Maybe she did love him? She didn't know, but she knew it wouldn't be hard for her to find him attractive. "Regardless if you want to find the truth, drink up. Do you really want to live a life of lies? You know this isn't right. Trust your gut, Swan, it'll tell you what to do."

Emma's heart broke, her gut had been screaming at her to trust him since the moment she opened the door. She was bad at believing in things or having faith, she figured her life had never given her many opportunities for that to be true, that was until Henry, her biggest believer. "Henry always says that."

"Then, if you won't listen to me, then listen to your boy," Killian said as he inched the bottle forward. He knew there wasn't anything else that could be said between them, it was all up to her now to decide whether she could trust him for a second.

Emma's arm inched forward in almost in slow motion every second her mind racing at a hundred questions per second, was she crazy, was he crazy, would she die, would she regret this, would she feel stupid, would everything be okay, would her kids be okay, would Walsh be upset? Finally, as she grasped the bottle she knew it was going to be now or never. She could do this, she had only ever trusted her ability to handle a situation once and that was when she decided to raise Henry instead of giving him up and that was the best decision of her life. If she could do that she could have some faith that she could overcome whatever happened next. So with that Emma closed her eyes and swung back the blue bottle.

Almost instantaneously she saw flashes beginning; the moment tears streaked down her face and she refused to hold the baby she had just given birth to. She saw the cities she previously listed in her mind, but every one of them empty, devoid of Henry, then she finally saw him. He was knocking on her door, she took him to Regina and claimed he wasn't her son. She saw a small woman that made her heart flutter in happiness, Mary Margret - no Snow White her mother. She saw Henry dying, she saw a man that made her feel safe David - her father, she saw a dragon, magic, Neal, Peter Pan, Evil Queen, portals, true loves kiss. She knew the order of her flashes was wrong, she knew because she remembered. She remembered it all. She finally took notice of the man in front of her, who looked worried as she forced herself to keep a poker face and not reveal the ache in her chest that was threatening to have her collapse, but she never would. She realized that the lack of walls she lived with the past few years was a cruel joke of the curse, she never could completely move past everything because of her walls and without them, she now had a reason not to. "Hook."

"Did you miss me?" He replied in his usual suave tone, finally glad to see more strength and resilience in his Swan. But it also broke his heart to even consider what she must have felt the moment she realized her perfect life was a lie. It had always given him some solace to believe that with the curse Emma would have had a life she deserved, so it tore him up to know he had ripped that away that from her.

—

Most of the walk to her apartment was silent, as Emma continued to process everything that had happened. She figured Hook understood as he didn't push her rather accompanied her and let her set the pace. Once they finally entered her building Emma checked the time, there was still about an hour before Walsh would come home. Walsh her husband. She was married. She never thought she would get married after she gave Henry up she swore she never trust someone again, not like she had done with Neal, she knew the cursed version of herself was also upset with Neal but she knew that a part of her, the real her, couldn't bring herself to forgive him because had he just stayed she would've gotten a life with Henry. God, a life with Henry, her mind screamed. There was so much she needed to reconcile within herself. Her life had fallen apart and yet she had very permanent ties to a life she didn't even know she wanted now. Was she awful for it? She loved her daughter and Henry but she felt like an absolute failure of a mother. All the things she claimed to have known about taking care of a child were based on a curse, some of her happiest moments weren't hers. And then there was Walsh, she adored him but as much as she tried to remind herself that she loved him, she didn't feel it. Could someone just fall out of love with someone in a second or was she just also an awful wife? She wanted to blame the fact that she wasn't herself for the last four years, she wasn't as walled up, she wasn't as damaged, her life had been rough regardless but the Emma that married Walsh had been happy without him. The Emma now didn't even understand Walsh.

As they finally reached her front door she stopped her hand on the doorknob, she turned to Hook and struggled to say, "I have a daughter." There was no way for it to come off as gentle, there was nothing gentle about the situation. As his eyes widened she saw a realization that she didn't want to acknowledge, he pitied her. He pitied that her life fell apart, well she did too.

Killian was flabbergasted, his Swan, Emma - she wasn't his, had another child. A child that would forever tie her to a life in New York. He finally understood it wasn't about her job or her husband it was about the little girl inside that had done nothing wrong. He knew a thousand questions that must've been swarming in her mind. The doubts, the fears, it was different to raise a child when you believed you had already done it to realize everything was a lie. He always wondered if his Swan would ever have other kids, as much as he dreamt of possibly even having that with her, he always figured she would be the type to spend her life trying to redeem herself with Henry, even if the lad didn't see it fit. He understood her uncertainty, her life shattered and he knew Emma Swan, and she would feel alone. So he smiled, forgetting the ache in his heart he knew her family would help her but she wouldn't be alone, he wouldn't allow it, "I hope she has your hair." he said as he tried to reassure her.

Emma nodded slowly before turning, not acknowledging his comment but rather that it was time. As she opened the door she sighed as she realized neither of her kids were in the living room. "Take a seat I'll be back," Emma said as she slowly walked over to her son's room. As she lightly knocked she heard a quiet 'come in' before entering and seeing Henry sitting at his desk, most likely doing homework. "Hey, how was everything?" She silently cursed herself for how deflated her voice sounded, there was no antidote for Henry which meant she would have to lie but he still didn't deserve to worry.

"It was fun, she had a long day so now she's napping." Henry said, "Everything okay with you?"

She stared at Henry and couldn't help but smile, he was so big, he had grown into an amazing kid and she knew that a lot of that would forever be Regina, but she couldn't help but love that she had raised him, even if it was a cursed version of her, the last four years were real to them. "Yeah, long day, thanks for watching her. I'll be in the living room if you need me." Emma said as she quietly closed the door on Henry's skeptical glances. She knew Henry was inquisitive and that would only lead to her lying and if she could put it off for a little while longer than she would.

Emma sighed as she crossed the hallway to the door to Holly's room. She stood still for a second willing her heart to slow its pounding. Her hand trembled as she lightly pushed open her door. Emma's breath hitched she couldn't quite understand the moment besides the fact that she knew that, this Emma, her un-cursed self, fell in love with the sleeping girl. Emma felt every fear, regarding Holly, in her fade away. She almost wanted to laugh at how ridiculous she had felt for fearing that she wouldn't love the little girl in front of her. Emma couldn't keep her eyes off of her, it was as if a part of her was just meeting her but every ounce of her body loved her and just wanted to grab her in her arms and not let go.

Henry was different, not a day had gone by since the moment she gave him up that she hadn't loved him, through curses and through realm travel she had endured it for him and she would continue doing so. But to her, it felt as if she just woke up from a long nap and now she had a daughter who's memories with her felt real but at the same time it felt as if another version of her lived them and she simply observed. Emma sat down next to the little girl, she couldn't help herself she raised her hand and gently played with her curls. As much as her irrational fears of not loving Holly, not caring about her, walking away were finally calmed, her mind was a hostile place at the moment and a part of her began contemplating the fact that she was never truly a mother. It had all been a curse and before leaving Storybrooke as much as she thought she was a mother to Henry, a part of her screamed, that she was only able to do it because she had Snow, David, and Regina, even Neal towards the end. The only time she had parented Henry alone before the curse was their trip to New York and that ended in Henry hating her, and having to call Snow for comfort. Maybe she couldn't do it, maybe she needed a curse to be a good mother, what if she ruined Holly and Henry?

Emma stood up but not before crouching down to lay a gentle kiss on the top of the girl's head. As Emma closed the door to Holly's room she couldn't help and sigh, she had settled all these fears with Henry long ago before the first curse even broke, but now waking up and fearing it all again scared her, just as Henry entering her life had.

However, Emma knew that there was no fixing her fears about Holly the more she thought about it the more she wanted to grab her kids and run away from everything. But she knew she couldn't she owed her parents, Regina and all of Storybrooke better than that. And in the meantime, she would have to settle for calming her pounding heart as it began to match her pulsing head.

"Okay, so tell me what's happened?" Emma said as she began rummaging her cabinets for something to take the edge off of this whole day.

Killian began explaining how he arrived with everyone else but simply couldn't bring himself to stay, he claimed it was the pirate in him but Emma suspected otherwise. He explained how he hadn't heard much of the royals besides that they were amidst a war and they had been seeking allies all around. He continued to explain how Neal and Belle seemed to have taken over the Dark Palace and used it for good, using it as a makeshift hospital for the wounded and even a temporary home for children whose parents had been lost because of the war.

"So who's exactly threatening them?" Emma asked avoiding looking at Killian, it wasn't that she didn't want to hear about their friends or that it was Neal, she just wanted to fix the problem so that maybe her life would make sense afterward.

"The Wicked Witch I believe, like I said Swan, I left it's hard for me to fill in this for you. I'm sure once we return to Storybrooke your parents can explain it all." It was the first mention of her returning to Storybrooke since she drank the antidote, and they both knew it was the next step, but Killian was still careful to not push too fast. "You're the savior, Swan."

"You know what I was yesterday?" Emma grumbled as she swung her glass back allowing the bourbon to burn her throat and possibly cloud her insecurities. "A mother until you showed up and started poking holes in everything I thought was real. When I drank that potion it was like waking up from a dream — a really good dream."

"You're still a mother, Swan. You have what matters most your lad and lass." Killian felt an ache for her, she was quiet and he doubted it all had to do with the young ones in the home. He had shattered her world and while he believed it was worth it and what she would ultimately would've chosen it, it hurt to see her so conflicted.

Before Killian could further try to reassure her they both froze at the sound of keys jingling at the door. Walsh was coming. Emma's mind raced to all her fears of Walsh, would she still love him, would she want to leave or would it be much like Holly where she just needed to see him to realize her feelings. Emma couldn't quite decipher what would be easier, not loving him and coming to terms with the fact that it had all been a lie or loving him and having to lie to him in every way possible.

How did she tell the father of her child that everything she shared with him was based on a lie and less than an hour ago she was actually worried she wouldn't love their daughter? How had her life gotten so messed up?

—

"It's ready." Regina explained upon seeing the gurgles of the darkest of curses that filled the cauldron. Snow and Charming stood to her side silent. In the recent weeks following the visit with the Good Witch the Wicked Witch was able to move her forces closer completely obliterating a neighboring kingdom and gaining strategic control of the roads. She was playing a waiting game and their time was running out. Their allies were distraught fending for themselves and their people who were barely scraping by and were in no place to aid the Charmings any further.

"No," Snow said staring into the dark abyss of the cauldron. She couldn't, wouldn't take the life of the man she loved. "There has to be another way to get to Emma."

"There isn't. You know if there were I would've gone back to Henry. This is it." Regina explained again, as much as she once dedicated her life to making Snow's life miserable she hurt for the woman in front of her. Perhaps it was because for the last few years they shared the same pain.

Charming felt Snow's hand tighten around his and as much as feared a life, or the lack thereof, without Snow he knew they had no other way around this. They were failing, they had failed. It would only be a couple more attacks until their allies were wiped out until their friends were gone and then the witch would come for their son. And as if that wasn't already everything they feared Charming had spent countless months wondering what dark curse she would want to enact so badly that she would invest years in procuring the exact heart. She had to be stopped and Charming knew they no longer had any way of doing so, only Emma could do it.

Emma his darling girl, the girl he would've, almost did, die protecting when she was hours old. A daughter he trekked through Neverland to protect a daughter he would've given and done all for and if the last thing he could do was die so that she could be reunited with her mother than so be it. Emma deserved it, Emma deserved better than what cruel fate had thrown at her and as much as he dreamt that she was happy in New York he knew it wouldn't be enough without her knowing about them and at least if he did this, she'd have Snow and Leo.

"Snow, we have to do this." He gently guided her away from the noisy caldron and away from Regina who knew to give them space. " _You_ have to do this."

"I can't." Snow couldn't hold in the tears that rolled down her cheeks. She couldn't fathom a world in which she wouldn't wake up next to Charming, where he wouldn't race around their home chasing a giggling Leo, where he wouldn't whisper happy memories of their daughter to soothe their pain, where his piercing blue eyes wouldn't let her know how his world revolved around their family."I can't crush your heart. I can't lose you."

"You could never lose me. But this-this is our only chance. This is Leo's only chance. Think of him. Think of being his mother." He knew that this was their only option and he knew that Snow knew it too this was why they had made it to this point, they both knew.

"He won't know you."

"Of course he will." Charming smiled and clung to her hands. "Through you, we always shared one heart. It'll only grow stronger. When you look at his face and see the love for you I have in his eyes. "

"I've loved you from the first moment I saw you."

"And I'll love you until my last." They leaned in and both tried to forget for a second that it would be the last kiss they shared. Snow prayed she would forever remember the feeling of his lips on hers and the feeling of his heart beating in his chest. Charming wanted nothing more than to know Snow would be okay, that their kids would be okay.

"Okay! Do it." Charming said pulling away from Snow but not releasing her hand and turning towards Regina.

The next few moments were a blur for Snow it felt as if she were watching everything happen but at the same time she wasn't really present but just living a horrible nightmare. She heard Regina mumble something about pain and saw Charming, her Charming gasp in pain as Regina's hand disappeared into his chest and return with a heart that was nothing but pure. "Charming?" How could she do this? How could she end the life of her husband? She knew if she didn't she would be ending that of her son's and that of the countless others but why was life so utterly cruel to her? She lost her daughter only to regain her only to lose her again only to have a son who she could now also lose and now she would kill her husband.

"Don't say goodbye." He requested forcing a smile on his face. He couldn't have her last memory of him be one of pain.

"I love you. I love you more than anything." She didn't know if it was a final plea or if it was her resignation.

"Which is why you have to crush it."

She wasn't sure if she was breathing let alone still awake but she felt Regina lift her hand in order to hold Charming's heart. But she wouldn't look down she would savor every second she got seeing him alive she could. She wouldn't miss a single one. Her body felt as if it was on autopilot as it lifted the heart behind her into the cauldron. She put pressure on the heart soon feeling the heart succumb to her and frail into ashes slipping through her fingers, just as Charming's other hand went limb and his body collapsed in front of her.

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 **Disclaimer: Some text still belongs only to OUAT.**

 **AN: Sorry for the long hiatus, hope someone is still reading.**


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